The touchpad on my laptop has gone all wonky (official term) on me, and it's still under warranty, so I got in touch with HP. I used their tech chat feature, which I suggest you avoid at all costs. The tech was painfully slow in responding and replied with helpful comments like this one:
Ross: My touchpad isn't working. Most of the time it doesn't function at all, but even when it does, the cursor jumps around all crazy-like and it isn't usable.
Tech: Can you please elaborate on your problem?
Ross: Um...I guess. My touchpad doesn't work. I put my finger onto the touchpad and move it around, but my cursor doesn't respond. The touchpad doesn't work.
Tech: From what you've told me, I understand that the touchpad doesn't work. Is this correct?
Ross: Holy crap, I hate you so much!
...
So yeah, that went on for about an hour. I actually started writing a post using the chat transcript that HP was nice enough to email to me, but it became too long, angry, and filled with expletives, so I scrapped it in favor of this one.
The part of the whole ordeal that annoyed me the most went a little bit like this:
Tech: Ok, I'm really annoying and it's my goal to ruin your day, but you've endured my mental sparring and I deem you fit for a warranty repair. I'll initiate a repair order.
Ross: Thanks. So can I get it repaired locally?
Tech: I'm sorry, your warranty doesn't cover local repair. You're going to have to use mail-in service.
Ross: Ok fine... whatever... I can't take it anymore. Just tell me what I need to do.
Tech: 1477 3rd ave, New York
Ross: What?
Tech: That's the closest authorized service center to your location.
Ross: Great, that's like 5 blocks from my apartment. Can I just bring it there myself then?
Tech: No, FedEx will pick up your computer and deliver it to the service center. After the repair is finished, FedEx will pick it back up from the service center and deliver it back to you.
Ross: That's absurd. If I bring it to/from the service center myself, it will save me money on shipping supplies, save you money on FedEx, save FedEx on gas and labor, save the environment on fuel and emissions, and save time for everyone involved. And on top of all that, my computer will be a lot less likely to break during transit.
Tech: I'm sorry, your warranty will not cover the service if you bring it to the service center yourself. I'll be happy to have FedEx deliver a box and shipping supplies though.
...
Like I said, big ol' crap sandwich. So here's my plan:
1. I bring my computer to the service center (0.6 mi)
2. They repair it for me
3. I pick it up and bring it home (0.6 mi)
Computer fixed with total transportation of 1.2 miles (as determined by google maps).
Here's HP's plan:
1. FedEx delivers a box. I'm sure HP is planning on shipping the box from somewhere, but for ease of calculations, I'm going to pretend that FedEx has everything on hand and just needs to deliver it to me. So FedEx brings the box to my office. (2 mi)
2. I bring my laptop from home to my office. (3.5 mi)
3. I pack up my computer and FedEx picks it up and brings it to their sorting facility (2 mi)
4. FedEx delivers my computer to the service center (4.5 mi)
5. The service center repairs my computer and FedEx picks it up, bringing it back to their sorting center. (4.5 mi)
6. FedEx delivers the computer to my office (2 mi)
7. I bring my computer back home (3.5 mi)
Computer is fixed (and hopefully not broken again in transit) with total transportation of 22 miles.
Yeah...that makes sense. HP's method takes a long longer and increases travel 18 fold. Awesome HP... awesome.
Monday, April 07, 2008
Saturday, April 05, 2008
How is this man going to survive the debates?
I hadn't seen an interview with John McCain in quite some time before this. Actually, the last time I remember hearing him speak in more that a quick sound bite was at my college commencement ceremony. I didn't like him then, and I don't like him now, but I still assumed he would be properly prepared for his presidential campaign. I guess not. Is this guy serious? How is he ever going to make it through the debates (or any actual media attention) with answers like the ones he gave to Letterman?
Did he really say the economy is fine because everyone can just sell stuff on ebay?
Did he really say that people who are struggling to pay their mortgage will just have to dip into their savings?
Did he say that the war in Iraq is to protect Israel from Iran?
Did he really say the economy is fine because everyone can just sell stuff on ebay?
Did he really say that people who are struggling to pay their mortgage will just have to dip into their savings?
Did he say that the war in Iraq is to protect Israel from Iran?
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